John,

It was so great to see you. I still can't believe I ran into you after just talking about you the day before with Scott. Life is good that way, and the Lord is always reminding us, "HE" is there and hears us.

Scott was so excited that I had seen you and now he really wants to come to see you and some of the others.

For senior service project at his high school, the hours have to be done during this school year before the end of April. Scott does not need many hours as he has already done much community service at other sites close to home, but he has always wanted to finish up with doing Edgewood.

I think it is so great that he, on his own wants to go back and embrace that which he has come from. It is a very good sign of him being healed and I think the final goodbye to leaving that all in his past, as he gets ready to light the world on fire.

I know you say you don't take credit for Scott's progress and healing, but you have to take some. I don't know if any of you will ever know how eternally grateful I am of the help, support, patience and teachings you all gave my son and me. It was the hardest times of our lives, but looking back and seeing how we actually not only survived it, but we reigned in glory over it, well I can't even think about it without crying tears of joy and gratitude.

Because of this milestone in Scott's life of graduating, it has brought us to go back many times in this last year and reflect on all we went through, and just how blessed we are.

The positive in it, is that both Scott and I have a bond that can never be broken and a trust and understanding of the other, without ever having to speak a word. We also are both so strong in that nothing will ever seem impossible, because of that which we have already overcome.

For the people that would feel sorry for us in our situation during that time, I would say please don't, for neither Scott or I have regretted the gifts that were revealed to us because of our journey. WE GET IT, and some will go their whole lives and never get it, so we are the lucky ones.

Scott is so beautiful and loving, and is such a colorful spirit to have around. He can give much to the children at Edgewood, who sit where he once sat, and who better to help them, but one who already lived and survived their pains. In my heart, it has always been something I had prayed he would do, but only if it was of his own choice. So again, I am overjoyed of his expressions of wanting to return, because as his mother, I know this will be the final chapter in his letting go forever.

Thank you all so much for the job you do at Edgewood, I know not all the children have happy endings and I am always praying for their healing. So I felt it was very important to share one happy ending, so you all have the opportunity you deserve, to feel the joys and purpose of your work. If even one can be saved, it will have all been worth it.

John please feel free to share this letter with any of the staff that knew and worked with Scott. Tell them all we said hello, and to consider themselves hugged.

Also feel free to share this with any parents that might feel like they have no hope for their own situations, and who are burdened down with grief. That they might have some hope from a parent who understands and has endured already the pain they fee. Tell them to hang in there and never give up, and maybe they will be forever blessed like us. You can't know if there is hope without giving it all you have, so tell them, be strong and seek out their blessings wherever they can find them. Of course it is always a risk, that no matter what you do, or how hard you try, your child might not be healed fully. If that would have been the case for us, it would have been sad, but I would have been able to eventually accept it, and I always would have been able to live with the fact, that we tried our best and gave him every opportunity for a healthy recovery. At least we could have gone on with our lives without any guilt of not trying or not caring. In my opinion, that would be worse to live with, than the child not fully healing.

I am here always, if ever I can be of any help or support to any families or children. My home, my phone, my e-mail and my insight are always available to help anyone who needs it. I believe strongly in giving back the gifts I have been given.

Scott will be calling Peppy and you soon in the few days to arrange some time to give to those precious children who need him.

Have a great day,

Love and Blessings
"Proud to be the Mom"

July 16, 2004


Ms. Peppy Howard-Wilms
Director of Special Education
Edgewood Children's Center
330 North Gore
St. Louis, MO 63119-1699

Dear Peppy,

We gave it the good fight but in the end, we've lost the battle, for now. Unfortunately, today is "John's" last day at Edgewood due to the Francis Howell School District's decision to move him. Alisha and I feel so fortunate to have worked with you and your staff at Edgewood.

A teacher and a therapist embraced "John" from the start. We always felt like they enjoyed having him in their class despite the problems he may cause from time to time. There was never a time we felt they did not care for him or that they did not like him because of a prior incident. Your therapist is a compassionate, caring person who genuinely wants to help these children succeed. She was always available to talk to whenever we needed her. "John" responded well to her and we appreciated her experience and expertise.

Your staff was there to offer helpful advice whenever we needed it too. He helped us through the initial turmoil that accompanies any change for our kids. He was also understanding and accommodating with our questions and requests.

Really, everyone with whom we came into contact at Edgewood was always the utmost professional and caring individual. We couldn't have asked for a better environment for "John" over the last seven months. Please make sure you let everyone know how much we appreciate their efforts.

We remain hopeful this will prove to be a positive transition for "John". Only time will tell. Thank you for the loving care you provided for our son.